dreaming

alhamdulillah incik saiful back for good last 2 months. im not alone anymore. yeay!!

tiap2 hari pg kerja sama2. he's the pilot and me the boss.

last mth i want o check up during period time and the doc gave me "clomide"
doktor ckp makan tiap2 mlm before tdo dr 2nd day period sampai day 6th. and MESTI bersama dgn suami pd hari ke 10, 12 & 14. mesti mean WAJIB. hari yg lain2 adalah percubaan, :)

last two weeks i keep dreaming about baby boy. dh 3 kali mimpi yg berlainan tp semua pasal baby boy. bile tye incik saiful die ckp cube check kt internet. lps check xde jawapan pon.

maybe sb i really need a baby.

oh fyi kt ofis dh ade 3 org yg tgh pregnant. n ade mcm2 gaya.

but i hope everything will be fine.

psst : need to find a sandal. all the high heels can put in a store.

waiting... until he come back

yeayy... finally he will back for good.
insya allah on the 11th we will meet again. :) suke2

its 4 months without him by my side. sangat sunyi.
4 months is like 4 years.

when i post to his fb wall that "im craving for lamb chop. sile balik cepat "
the feedback that i got is:
from akak : are you pregnant? congrats dear.

from my opis mate : weh ko dueorg ni mcm org tgh bercinta plk.

from cousins : sile balanje kami.

the pregnant thing sangat kelakar okey. how can im getting pregnant if my hubby is not here with me for a past 4 months.

berchenta ? of coz we're still in berchenta mode. and we like it. sometimes we still thinking that we like young ppl who just know whats is love. dan kami sangat2 dilamun cinta. :)
balanje? yes all darlings of course. do pray for us dimurahkan rezeki.

erm 6 days until he back to me :)

i love this picture. thx kak lily for this lovely candid.

mertua vs menantu

im so not updated person especially about the drama melayu. right now i followed the mertua vs menantu season 1 drama at astro prima every monday - friday 8pm (ulangan je yek)
maybe during the 1st season im not married so i dont have a mertua yet.
and right now i hv it already :D ngee..
yeah not all the mertua is same like in the tv but it still exist in this modern world. luckily im not married with a somebody who came from rich and formal family. my FIL is a policeman and my MIL is a housewife. his father is so caring and he is a good mechanic and his mother is not working.
opps his sister got 7As 2Bs in spm. quite terer rite?

until now i still trying to accept my MIL even its not sepenuh hati yet but i try okey.
then what should i do when the MIL said its ok if her son want to sambung his kerja at Riyadh until next 6 months or next year. bukannye lama sgt pon. alah.. sabarlah. keje kt sna dpat byk sikit gaji.

if u (the reader) at my side. wut should u do?
a: meraung sambil hentak2 kaki ckp tak nakkkk i want my hubby rite now and terus tempah tiket nk pg sna. i suggest naik ethitad okeh for better service.
b: buat sekali jelingan tajam to ur MIL n terus buat muke 14
c: tepuk tangan tanda gembira sb ur husband akan balik lg lmbt dr skrang n thats mean u' re now bujang kembali.
or
d: diam. senyum. buat mcm xde pape. tp...... bile die dh balik terus kol ur hubby and luahkan semua sambil baling sume bantal yg ade atas katil and menangis sampai agak2 pening kepala and tomorrow kne mekap mata cantik2 agar ur opis mate x perasan yg mata u bengkak.

..........................................................................................................................................i choose
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D

kasih sayang

presenting our new niece
NUR WIDAD BINTI FIRDAUS
oh she so comeyy.

lets eat

enuf with all the emo things :)
ok im back to normal even though hv a drama yesterday between me n MIL. huhuhu sensetip okeh.
here i attached the.... (ayat rutin every week when email the CF to ED hehehe) ok the pic of food that nice ... yummy... n i suggest the reader to go n try it by ur self. (fully recommended by me n my hubby)

mee rebus ramli @ ipoh town

ABC but i only put jagung n syrup plus susu lebih :)
andthe best coconut shake in melaka - u can get it at jln klebang. near firefly kinder-garden (wahh mcm la glamer sgt tadika dina) if u come around peak hour u hv to Q at least 10 - 15 minutes to get 1 cup of coconut shake. so better dtg awal dtg lmbt (tu pon klu ade lg la that coco-shake itu)

the murah n delicious satey at kg.jawa :D
tp nk mkn ni pon kne beratur jugak klu peak hour.
tmpt ni kt blakang2 kedai so dun aspect its a proper restaurant. it just a satey-stall.

warung mak teh mee banjir udang at kuala sepetang.
ok i dun like the mee udang taste. but its the way its cooked. its not pedas but the prawn is so sweet. asyik bangat mkn udang. las2 kami habiskn udang je. yg lain2 kami tinggalkn. hehehe.

i cant wait for our next vacation and honeymoon "wink" "wink"

whats the meaning of love?

it's march already. its means we have been married for 8 months. its quite a long time even though its not enter a year yet.

dulu die penah ckp klu sampai bulan 2 ni die still x dpt balik die nk bawak pg riyadh ddk sama2 dgn die. tp... mg x la kn. dr dlu lg aku dh tau ape jawapannye.

being married its not as beautiful as i ever dream. maybe for our 3 quarter of our journey im not happy as other couple. but i really hope this difficult things will end soon. im tired for all of this.

he said that i envy to my office mate that she's being pregnant. sudah tentu. perempuan mana yg tk nk mengandung lebih2 lg anak itu adalah anak org yg paling kite sayang. tp kenapa la ssh sgt si suami nk paham? tp aku xde la rase jeles sgt ngn yun sb aku tau die mg mengharapkan new child since haziq pon dh besar.

i know im selfish im very rude to my husband. i know my dosa sgt besar. tp salah ke klu aku meminta hak aku sbgai seorg isteri??

tk de sape yg paham ape yg aku rase. tk de org nk hidup mcm ni. aku x mintak pon ini akan terjadi dlm hidup aku. penah ade makcik nih tye "ko x mengandung lg ke? apelah lambat sgt. dak A (anak die) cepat je mengandung". ya allah aku rse mcm nk tumpahkn je air yg aku bawak tu kt muke die.

yer sy mg tension. sy mg akan lakukan apa saja klu org buat saya. tp blh ke tu sume mengubah kenyataan skrang?

ya allah berilah hamba-Mu ini lebih kekuatan utk menempuhi hari2 yg mendatang.

Setiap hari kumohon
Agar Kau sentiasa
Memberiku ketenangan dalam hati... kekuatan
Menempuh segala dugaan yang mencabar ini
Pasti punya ertinya
Engkau beriku harapan
Menjawab segala persoalan
Hadapi semua dengan tenang

Dengan merasa kesyukuran
Ku doa Kau selalu
Mengawasai gerak-geriku
Berkatilah ku penuh rahmat dari Mu

Oh Tuhan terangkan hati dalam sanubariku
Untuk menempuhi segala hidup penuh cabaran ini
Oh Tuhan ku berserah segalanya kepadamu
Agar jiwaku tenang dengan bimbingan Mu selalu

Ada kalanya ku merasa hidup ini seperti kaca
Jikalau tidak bersabar
Hancur berderailah akhirnya
Tabahkanlah hatiku
Melalui semua itu... Ooh...
Kuatkanlah
Cekalkanlah diriku

Curahkanlah nikmat Mu pada hidupku

♥ ♥ 7 months ♥ ♥

alhamdulillah. today is our 7 months together as hubby n wifey.
thanks Allah for this relationship.

today he's going to Mekah doing umrah and alhamdulillah semuanya selamat.
he stay there for a night and tomorrow after solat jumaat he will back to Riyadh.
10 hours drive is quite a long journey to travel and i cant sleep last night. keep thinking when he will safely arrive. maybe if i was there at this time, i also going to Mekah for umrah together with him. but its not my rezeki yet. i want to go there again. i want to tawaf the Kaabah. i want to see the beautiful Allah's house. i hope one day i can be there. murahkan rezeki kami utk melawat rumah-Mu ya Allah. amin.

notes : die sudah botak. cant wait to see him botak.

i need some space to breath

1st entry in 2010.
happy hari wilayah to KL, putrajaya & labuan.
i need a space for me to take a deep breath. i know im too selfish. i know i want anything that i cant get it right now. huh.

he back to Riyadh last month after 2 weeks stay in Msia. he told me that he's gonna back for good this end of feb. but yesterday he said that maybe he will back in the early march or end of march. its mean that he gonna stay for another month. but its not confirm until he get the letter from his company.

i know im not a good wife. but pliz understand my feeling. even though u are too far from me pliz understand my situation. (klu x paham pon buat2 paham dh cukup membahagiakn)

when i said that i hate my life after married. he said i choose this life. when i said that i dont like he works at Riyadh, he said im not bersyukur since we can married earlier without berhutang. (his salary quite big there and enuf to pay all the expenses and my duit hantaran.
when i said i love my life right now. do all the things alone. stay alone in my hse. dun want to think more about marriage life and just want to focus on my career he said that i dont care about him anymore. arghhh i hate this!!

i just want a happier life to live.

i want to get pregnant and deliver his baby.

i want him everyday in my life.

i want to breath the same air with him.

is it he can understand my feeling? is it he knows that my life would suck without him??

notes : i hate ppl that always ask me dh berisi ke belom. its including my MIL. are they knows that i dont a "penyumbang sperm" right now. how i want to get pregnant?? izit i can buy the sperm at any supermarket so i can senyawakan with my ovum???
arghh if buat anak tu mcm buat kuih dh lama aku buat x payah nk ssh2 hidup sorang2 menjawap sume pertanyaan bodoh itu.